As an expectant mother and expat in London, Jessica Hill felt nervous about being far from family and friends. But then, at a friend’s suggestion, she enrolled in parenting workshops offered by the UK-based National Childbirth Trust, where she found a support network that led to lifelong friendships. “It was a lifesaver for me and my husband postpartum,” she says.
When the couple returned to the U.S. in 2013 and settled in Westport, Connecticut, with their two sons (age 2 and 4 at the time), Hill saw an unmet need. “I just kept hearing over and over again from moms about how lonely it was. Moms would even say to me that they secretly were excited to go back to work because they sort of felt lost at home, and [they] felt so much guilt about that.”
Those conversations inspired Hill to launch The Parent Collective, a prenatal education series that promotes the development of long-term relationships among expectant parents. “So many new parents feel isolated, and we are trying to change that,” she says. “I think there’s a unique opportunity with prenatal education in that everybody is excited and nervous, anticipating what’s to come…. So they are really open to connecting with other people going through that same experience. Especially post-COVID, I think people are hungry for in-person connections.”
The Collective has two locations in Westchester—at Vivvi in Hartsdale and Yoga Haven Studio in Tuckahoe, which opened last year. The four-week prenatal classes taught by nurses or certified nurse midwives are held in person as well as a Zoom postpartum meet up after babies are born for birthing parents to reconnect. The curriculum covers late-stage pregnancy and labor, various types of delivery and pain management, bottle feeding and breastfeeding, new baby care, and postpartum transitions.
Hill, who became a certified motherhood coach during the pandemic, emphasizes the Collective’s evidence-based and inclusive way of approaching childbirth topics. The content uses the best available research (facts, statistics, and hard evidence) on the safety and effectiveness of specific practices to help guide maternity care decisions and to facilitate optimal outcomes for mothers and newborns, says Hill, and unlike Lamaze and other agenda-driven programs, hers is parent-driven. “It’s not for us to say there’s a right way or a wrong way. It’s for us to help [parents] feel empowered in their decisions and give them the information they need to be successful,” she says.
Grouped together by due date and where they live, participants meet up on Zoom after childbirth to reconnect, talk about how their deliveries went, how they’re doing, and to ask questions. They also have access through the Collective’s website to myriad resources for help in navigating postpartum mental health issues, including anxiety and depression, and the unique needs and challenges of fathers and partners.
Caroline Jones is a certified nurse midwife and NYC-based childbirth educator and has been leading in-person classes at the Tuckahoe location since it opened last year. “There are so many different ways [childbirth] could go. Being informed and prepared for the different outcomes goes a long way in helping women have a positive birth experience,” and having a support network once they have their babies is “a huge benefit as well,” says Jones.
“Being with the other parents and hearing their thoughts and questions made me feel a little less alone,” says new mother and Parent Collective client Laura Murphy, a Westchester native living in Riverdale. The classes provided “a space for both me and my husband to ask questions,” she says, and the topical handouts “helped me organize my thoughts and process everything,” relieving the pressure of “frantically Googling” questions as they came up.
For Murphy, the classes about breastfeeding and newborn care were especially helpful. “I felt like, up to that point, my entire focus was just about the pregnancy itself instead of what actually was coming after giving birth,” she says.
To help reduce new-parent burnout, the Collective coaches couples through Fair Play, a parenting therapy method that helps couples “rebalance the invisible load” of responsibilities that come with childcare and housework. “It’s about both partners feeling appreciated and like they’re a part of a team,” says Hill. “Being mindful and having those conversations can alleviate a lot of bumps in the road.”
Related: What’s Life Like as a Stay-at-Home Dad in Westchester?
